Whole 30 Week 3: Fuck you rice bran!

I realized this week that the cashews I’ve been eating, oh, EVERY DAY have rice bran in them. Even Ollie couldn’t stop crying when we figured this out. So that was just the perfect soundtrack to go along with my failure: screaming baby.

I don’t know how I missed this. I’ve been so hyper vigilant, reading labels like they’re my Twitter feed. I even emailed my friend to ask about the ingredients in the hamburgers they will be grilling at her son’s birthday party.

Friends, I’ve read the Whole30 Q&A. I saw the answer to that question about, “Do I need to start over if I accidentally eat something off plan?” The Hartwigs may say yes, but do you know what I say?

Fuck you rice bran! No! I am not starting over!

Thanks, and sorry Mom. I needed to get that off my chest.

Things have been going alright, aside from the rice bran catastrophe. My gut is still lining out, but I have not had a c diff reoccurrence. My mood is still on a bit of a roller coaster, but hey, this is me we’re talking about. 

I can tell I’ve lost weight. I don’t know how much since, per the Whole30 rules, I have not weighed myself. But enough that I was able to swap my jean inventory. My skinny jeans are now in the closet and my maternity wear and fat pants are in the probably giveaway because I’ll never get around to organizing that garage sale box. My skinny jeans are not especially comfortable yet, but I can stuff my thighs in and button all but one pair.

The other sort of notable thing happening is the throwing up. On Ollie’s part. Throw up, spit up. It’s hard to tell the difference at the wee age of 3 months. Mainly the volume has increased dramatically. Also I seem unable to completely drain a breast. Which means my letdown is pretty forceful and Ollie’s having a hard time with this. She almost won’t nurse on the left side.

So I’m left pondering… Is she sick and not eating as much? She seems otherwise quite well, in good spirits, feverless and excreting waste on schedule. Is she allergic to something I ate? I can’t think of anything new I added in the last week.  Is she just gagging herself? This is partially to blame I think; she’s always chewing on her fingers. But it doesn’t explain why my breasts are so full.

OR, has my milk supply increased now that I’m off antibiotics and eating a nutrient rich diet. I suspect/hope this is it. Ruby did spit up SO MUCH more than Ollie has until now. I thought the girls were just different, but perhaps I didn’t even realize my milk supply was down while sick. It kind of makes sense, right?

My health: It sucks

Let’s discuss health and fitness for a moment. Oh boy. My health… sucks. There’s really no other way to put it.

First there was that nasty breast infection that lasted for freaking ever because the first antibiotic I was prescribed didn’t work. On the last day of the antibiotics a cold kicked in. Complete with fever. The stomach bug came along about a week later, while still blowing my nose infinity times a day.

It’s been over a week of this crap (no pun intended). I just found out this morning that this stomach bug is related to the breast infection antibiotics and not a virus. So today is day one of FORTY-TWO days on another antibiotic. I sent a note to my doctor… Part of me hopes the 42 days was a miscommunication between her and the pharmacy. The other part feels uncomfortable that there could be such a miscommunication.

The only sort of twisted silver lining of this thundercloud is that I have lost some weight. That was losable. So far I’ve lost about 28 lbs of the roughly 40 lbs I gained while pregnant with Ollie. I suspect it will take a long time to lose the remaining 12 lbs, and I’m okay with that… Who am I kidding? I want it off NOW. But my health comes first and I know it will take awhile if I do it the right way.

You know, through diet and exercise. Oh exercise. This sickness has really put a damper on the exercise. I’m still getting out there, but I’ve had to slow down and stop and back track and, well, it’s just been discouraging. I feel soft and heavy and out of shape and like there’s nothing I can do about it. I know. I know. I just had a baby. I’m small to begin with so I know I don’t look like all these things to the average bystander. But that’s how I feel.

I also feel pain when I breathe deeply, cough, laugh, turn my body and lie down. Among other basic movements of life. This is because I now also have what is most likely an intercostal rib muscle strain, what I’m told is basically a pulled rib muscle.

In summary? I’m falling apart.

I’m trying to keep perspective. I’m trying to look at this like the before picture. I hope to look back on this a year from now and marvel at how much stronger and healthier I am. I’m trying to see this as a lesson to appreciate the good health I have the privilege of taking advantage of. My tummy troubles are temporary and peanuts compared to what my good friend with Crohn’s disease has to deal with.

So I’m trying. It sucks. And there you have it.

Monday Motivators: Just having a baby


Last Week: I met expectations. I walked 3 miles. I did my hip/butt strengthening exercises twice. And I squeezed out 5100 steps/day vs. my goal of 5000. This makes for a really exciting post. I know.

This Week: My only goal for this week is to have a baby. I recognize that this is not a smart goal since I have no actual control over my ability to meet it. Really I’m just giving myself permission to take it as easy as I want to. And have a baby if that’s what happens. Because, you know, nothing says “taking it easy” quite like childbirth.

Join the party! Choose your favorite way to link-up:

  1. Write a post describing your fitness goals for the upcoming week and how you did meeting last week’s goals. Include a link to this post somewhere in your post and a pingback will show up in the comments section below.
  2. Write a post and comment on this post with a link to your post.
  3. Share your goals as a comment on this post, or on Facebook, or Twitter, or whatever.
  4. Read through the comments and help motivate others.

Read this post for a little background on the birth of Monday Motivators.

Photo Credit: Labor by Bradley Gordon is licensed under CC BY 2.0 / Text added to original