What a body can take

It’s 1:30 am. I can’t sleep. My sickness (that I won’t describe) woke me and then Ruby called. And then Ruby called again. And I’m noticing that my breast is hurting more and more. I’m worried this is another breast infection. And I really don’t want another breast infection because I am already, currently, sick for the third time in three weeks. I don’t need a fourth.

I’ve really been trying to be optimistic these last couple days. To remind myself of things I should be grateful for. At least Ollie’s not sick. Or Ruby. Or Jason or my mom. At least my mom is still here to help. At least I don’t feel nauseated. At least I’ve been able to keep my fever down with Tylenol. At least we have good health insurance. At least my milk supply hasn’t dropped off as it could with sickness. At least it’s the weekend now and Jason is home.

Still, I’m not grateful for this sickness. I can’t stop fantasizing about running off to a hotel by myself. I miss the days when sick meant lots of sleep and lying on the couch watching TV. I want to rest. Without having to wake multiple times in the night to breastfeed. Without having to breastfeed at all. Without a toddler tantruming, or touching me or, really, talking at all. I just want to rest. PRIVATELY.

I need to rest. And I can’t sleep. Here I am, all alone in my silent living room writing this blog post. Oh the irony. I thought it fitting that I take care of one to-do while up with my, apparently, deteriorating body.


I have no idea how I will make this happen if I get in. But I do know this is the first step.


She rules

Ruby was playing around in our bed tonight with her new Minnie Mouse figurine. She turned on the clock radio, and “Royals” by Lorde was playing. So she started dancing of course.

Then it got to that part in the song when she sings, “And baby I’ll rule.” And Ruby repeated, “I woo.” In a sort of singing-like way.

And I was mildly impressed.

Right after that comes the, “I’ll rule, I’ll rule, I’ll rule,” part. You know the one. And Ruby just sang right along with it!

And I thought, “Wait. Did that just happen?”

I must have had a reaction, because the next time the song came around to that particular bit of the chorus Ruby gave me a look like, “You just get ready for this Mom.” And did it again.

And then. Well. She did it a third time.

I suppose this means she’s paying attention to car radio lyrics… How can this be???

Is anyone really all that surprised by ‘boobie’?

So I mentioned that I’ve been feeling good lately. And I can pinpoint several reasons why. Today I want to write about one of them.

In the last couple months, Ruby’s become so much more vocal.

I know every parent feels just a tad, or maybe a lot, anxious about the developmental milestones and whether her kid is on track. But I took that anxiety to a whole other level. Seriously people. You’re just going to have to trust me on this.

When Ruby still hadn’t said Mama or Dada (with meaning) at 14 months, I didn’t worry about a speech delay. I worried that she would never talk. My overactive brain took that fear and ran. RAN, my friends. It actually got much, much worse.


But now she’s “talking”, and it’s such a RELIEF. It’s like I am back to my normal state of excessive worry, and it feels Frosted Flakes tiger GREEEAAAAT!!! So I thought I’d share some of the adorable things she’s saying at 18 months.

Well, she’s got Mama/Mommy and Dada/Daddy down solid. Everything’s Mama these days. Bye Mama. Down Mama. Mama go.

So right… she says bye. Either just that. Bye. Or bye bee. And hi. Sometimes when I pick her up at night (Because, yes, she still does not usually sleep through the night.), she’ll cock her head to the side and look me straight in the eye. Then she’ll wave in my face and say, “Hhhhhi.”

And down. Pronounced dow. Also up. Often she says them together. Up a dow. Up a dow. Up a dow.

And go. This is a new one and she uses it when she means come. Like when she says, “Mama go.” Really she means, “Come with me, Mom.” She’s also yelled out a, “Go go go!” In the context of, “The time has come. The time is now. Marvin K. Mooney…”

Her first couple words (besides Mama/Dada) were uh-oh and more. So she says those a lot. And she doesn’t need an initial amount to want more. More is sort of her universal way of saying she wants something. It also means again.

After that it was around. Of all words… Of course she can’t enunciate around. It sounds more like a-wow. She’ll say it over and over again when referring to things that spin. Like the washing machine, a windmill or a fan.

At this point she seems most comfortable with the B sound. So she says ball, bowl, broom, bubble and banana. Ball (ba), bowl (bow) and broom (boo) all sound very similar. She says bubble pretty clearly, and banana is pronounced nanny.

And boobie. Of course. When she wants to nurse she’ll repeatedly poke my breast and say boobie. When she wants to switch breasts, she’ll sit up, wave to the one she just finished and say, “Bye boobie.” Then she’ll start with the ‘boobies’ and the poking of the other breast.

She’s starting to learn colors too. She’s repeated something that sounds like yellow, but I don’t think she’s really understands it. I do think she knows blue. Probably because it starts with a B. She’s referred to both mine and Jason’s running shoes as ‘boo’. Which they are. Unless she was calling them a broom. And we weren’t even talking about colors either time. She spoke up about their coloring completely out of the blue. (Pun intended.)

She has not yet mastered please or, “Thank you for all your hard work.” But she does seem pretty adept at saying no. Here we go…